This be the Version for Long-distance Cyclists

It fucks you up, Audax UK,
And sends you to the very brink
Of craziness; but others say
That Audax is their meat and drink.

100k is just a stroll
Or so my friends have said to me;
But when you reach the next control
It leads you straight to PBP.

Addiction is the scourge of Man –
It fills us with unearthly dread
So pack as early as you can
And please do something else instead.